Who loves bologna? I love bologna.

I'm not going to apologize. I love bologna. I have loved it ever since I ate my first bologna sandwich on Wells Beach when I was just a little kiddo. It was all warm from the sun. I was cold from playing in the ocean for much longer than I probably should have. It was on soft, white wonder bread and it had full fat mayonnaise on it. The processed meat was sweet and salty and so so so delicious.
When I grew up, bologna was vilified by doctors and health experts and my healthy husband. But what do they know? They have never had a bologna sandwich with crunchy potato chips inside. They have never run home from school starving for a bologna sandwich. They have never had fried bologna and mashed potatoes for their hot lunch at school. They have never had to solve the debate over mayonnaise or miracle whip with their siblings. Bologna has a place in my heart...(a literal place probably) and I truly believe that my affection for it will protect me from its terribly unhealthy side effects.
This is why at Central BBQ in Memphis, Tennessee, I had to try the smoked bologna sandwich with BBQ sauce and coleslaw. I had an obligation to my younger self to honor the little girl on the beach. And this is also why I had to finish the half that my healthy husband couldn't manage to finish eating. Yes. I love bologna and true love lasts a lifetime.